I have another confession to make, well actually its really not a confession but, I don't know how it is  to be called so I'll just going to say that it is a confession kinda like.

Anyways!

Last night was a wake up call and maybe a reminiscing point of some kind of a feelings that I almost forget. My Pangga and I once again kissed. I repeat ONCE AGAIN KISSED. And take note! It's in the lips. Hmm, maybe not so intimate as it is but I can say that, that kind of kiss that I received last night( October 17, 2014) is like the first time that I have ever kissed him, but in a better and likeable way.

It was oozing and heaven like feeling because I care about my Pangga more than any of my friends, just like I once said to him that he is much important to me than my other friends.

So, ofcourse! After the kiss I feel vulnerable about my self again and It seems like everything was just yesterday.

I still can't forget the feeling of how we we're so close back then.

I'm still hoping that one day everything can turn back to normal just like the old times.

You know that feelings when you were in the middle of your happiness then all of a sudden your mood changes because of something majorly bad happened in your life. Well, I kinda felt that yesterday morning, (October 10, 2014, about 3:00 am - 5:00 am) while I was still with my friends having the time of our life and just making the last until we got drunk.

I lost the money for my last payment for my tuition fee, I lost 17k while having fun. I never expected that to happen because the whole 17k was in my panties and It is secured for me rather than putting it on my wallet.

I never realize that It was missing until I was about to buy some Graham balls. I were planning to buy 200 worth of graham balls then when I touch the middle part of my panties, everything is flat and I can't feel no folded money on my underwear.

At that point I was in a full swing, I'm panicking myself up, I'm shaking and I'm already freaking out, crying my head off and I am totally adrift of the situation that I never expected to happened ever in my entire life.

Things went so fast, the money were like only 10 hours on my care then completely vanished after that. I am speechless the time it had happened.

The other thing that really makes me cry at that moment, is that for the first time ever, I have tried to feel the real meaning and essence of "DISAPPOINTMENT" I am devastated and i just want to scream all the anger that is on me the moment occur.

After loosing all the hopes in me, I went home and I admit immediately to my mother that I lost the money. 

I don't want to tell everything after that because it is too personal to tell and it is not good for the readers to read.

I'm just happy for the way that I part my hair because it really describe me as who I really am.

Actually the Title is not really relevant to my dream. 

 Ladies and Gentlemen, I hate to cut it for you but you still need to click the "Read More" to see who's my latest celebrity crush.

Yes! After the short notice that I recently posted here (well, because it's a little late than usual) so... last September 24, 2014 until early dawn of September 25, 2014 we were together in lakay.

While my other friend and Baby were playing billiards for so much time already since I first arrive, I decided to go to other set of friends that I have in the same place and in the same time. 

I ask if maybe, I can go to my other friends first until they finish playing that time and as I wish they just let me to go there and have some shots already.

Then after a shot or two, in no particular time, Pangga pulled my I don't know type of  sleeveless yellow denim top and ask if where is our table and then I suddenly said that "We don't have table yet, It's me and baby with jc only and as you can see they're still playing so I jump in here to have some shots"

Pangga said that we need to separate table already because he has a friend with him namely "Kevin" so I immediately told my other set of friends that I have to go because my friends who I'm going to spend the night with was already there.

We throw each other kisses (not the literal throw) and they said their goodbyes and some of them had told me a pleasant hand gesture because we just met that night.

As we go to other table, I first introduce myself (which really happens all the time) to Kevin because he's a breathe of a fresh air to me (meaning as a new face) and my "Super-Being-Talkativeness" occur at that moment and I never stop until baby sit right next to me.

Well of course as I promise to apologize for my part, I utter my sincere apology for my baby for being over acting the night we argued.

And then as I expected, he forgive me. (well of course he can't resist to not forgive me because he love me. haha, Kidding baby! I love you :*)

So it went fabulous as my make up that night, everything were so smooth until we transfer back to my other set of friend's table for merging kinda thing and the issue of me and baby's argument went up to be the topic of the table.

I really don't know what happened but it comes roughly and I don't want to hear anything anymore so I decided to go home already. I left them there with no more notice that I'm already going.

So that's it for today, moving on....

P.S. After that night, I texted my baby the next day first thing when I woke up and he just said don't mind it anymore because he just don't want to stress himself up with such non sense things.

It's been such a rush that I never seen coming way back since we got okay with each other and I never thought that we will be going back to this situation again.